The Peer Educators and Counselors Club (PECC) held a graduation ceremony for 18 students on Friday, June 2. The annual ceremony concludes two and a half semesters of training - a journey that this time round began in during the Fall 2016 semester.
Peer Educators and Counselors Club draws its membership from students interested in engaging their fellow students on HIV/AIDS issues, life skills, behavior change, drug abuse and other issues of student concern.
To successfully complete their training, students had to attend five days of counselor-led group sessions, ten hours of personal supervision, as well as lead five peer group sessions. Other requirements included participating in community outreach and USIU-Africa Counseling Center events.
The new Peer Counselors will join the Red Cross Club at the Citibank annual community service day at Friends School Dandora on Saturday, June 10, and hold their first official training at Braeburn School on Friday, June 16. They will also be running the Peer Educators and Counselors Week in the second week of July.
Further information on the club is available from the Counseling Center’s Senior Counselor Ms. Noel Khayanje (nkhayanje@usiu.ac.ke).

By Lydia Winda

The month of October is global breast cancer awareness month which is geared at creating awareness about breast cancer and showing solidarity with cancer survivors, those we have lost to breast cancer and those who have lost their loved ones to breast cancer. Breast cancer is the most common cancer in women globally and the second most common cancer overall after lung cancer in both developed and developing countries, low – and – middle – income countries. This can be attributed to increase in life expectancy and the adoption of a western lifestyle. There were over 2 million new cases of breast cancer worldwide in 2018. In Kenya, there are 28,000 cases diagnosed annually.

Both men and women can get breast cancer, but it is more common among women. Some of the signs and symptoms of breast cancer include:

Your mind is the most powerful tool you have. Every minute, thoughts are being processed by your mind. Some are amplified and some are aborted. Whatever happens with the amplified thoughts, you find yourself making decisions and eventually acting out of what your thinking guides. Your thoughts also influence your perception and hence your interpretation of reality. This can be a make or break. Generally speaking, the mind needs to be crowned and empowered with effective thought strategies for it to flourish.

In this article, we are focusing on you making the decision to crown your mind and are using the word crown to signal the ability to empower and work with one’s mind to overcome mental and thought related obstacles for more effective results in life.

Imagine yourself:

• Being genuinely happy.
• Celebrating your own achievement of having a worry-free day!
• Saying NO to unhelpful patterns of thinking, because they don’t help anyway!
• Making better decisions because I am managing your thoughts and feelings effectively.
• Convincing your mind NOT to look at everything as negative.
• Experiencing a huge energy boost because everything, or most things make sense!
• Staying confident that you can do what you can; You am aware of what is not in your power and you know the difference.
• Viewing yourself, your life and people around you positively.

At a time as this in the world’s history when COVID-19 has been declared a pandemic, you may be faced with fear, uncertainty, doubt, threats and negative events, all which can have an impact on your mental health. You may notice that because your mind is still working, you are:

• Not happy, genuinely.
• Processing thoughts that feel toxic and out of your control.
• Worrying about events and situations that I honestly have no control over.
• Ruminating and feeling terrible about past failures and events.
• Struggling to move past a hurt, fear, trauma or pain for significant periods of time.
• Struggling to see anything positive.
• Low on energy and feeling discouraged about the turn of events.
• Feeling helpless and demotivated.
• Experiencing your thoughts as toxic.

How do you crown your mind?

Here are 7Rs that can help you manage your thoughts more effectively.

Recognize: You can catch yourself thinking positively, and you can nurture that thought through to action. You can also catch yourself thinking negatively, and question what is on your mind now. What are you thinking about now? You can actually stop these negative, unhelpful thoughts right now by focusing your attention elsewhere. You can take a stroll or take some action if required or helpful. You can actually turn the unhelpful thought into a solution!

Root: What makes you think this way? What actual consequence do you fear? Do I fear deadlines no wonder I’m struggling with this task? Am I afraid of being cross examined so I don’t want to make that presentation? Am I lacking knowledge and that makes me fear action? Are there past hurts that I am still nursing and which have become your ‘crutches’ for this type of thinking? Being aware of these things will help me focus on a solution and can engage your mind more proactively.

Record: You can put down your thoughts in a journal. You can even randomly write them as though You are talking to someone. You can set aside time to do this. If you don’t fancy writing, you can talk to someone you trust; or at least draw, sing out, dance, and put the energy into some productive physical activity and so on.

Rule it out: It is not so sometimes… Your mind is easily influenced sometimes, and it can be ‘pressured’ into thinking in certain negative unhelpful ways. You just need to stop that thinking because it may not be true. You may say this out loud, or speak yourself into an alternative, more positive, helpful thought.

Reframe: Recognize that the meanings and perspectives you attach to circumstances in your life can either make me move forward or hold me back. You can retell your story and change some of your mental narratives.

You can for instance, say ‘I am glad I have internet and can connect with my friends during this time of COVID-19 and social distancing restrictions’ instead of ‘I don’t have the freedom to move around to go see my friends.’

You can also discover powerful tools and resources that shift your thinking. For example, “I woke up to devastating news updates about the coronavirus and now I feel negative. I am grateful for being healthy and aware of my role in preventing or managing the virus.”

Resourceful: You can do something. You are a huge resource. The time that seems idle and makes you feel bored is actually a resource that can never be exchanged for anything else. You only need to put planned action into it, and you’ll be good to go! During this time, I have knowledge I can share with teenagers, for instance, instead of being too idle. I can help my younger siblings with homework and spend more time being helpful in place of worrying.

Retrain & Reclaim: Your unhelpful thoughts are historical. And your results are just the same- repetitive and unhelpful! You can build your mental power to enhance more positive and helpful thinking for instance “I went out and did not observe proper social distancing. Now that I’m experiencing some flu-like symptoms, I need to go into hospital to get checked.” This is better than “whoever brought about this coronavirus should be cursed!” This way, you reclaim your power to be more pro-active.

You could also remind yourself of achievements, moments, successful situations and times when you did well and felt more empowered. These are likely to elicit a positive response, and more important, a realization that you have succeeded before and you still hold that power within!

You can CROWN your mind!

“Don’t let anyone/thing rent a space in your head, unless they’re a good tenant”

-Author unknown.

By Lydia Winda

Covid 19 pandemic has brought a new normal that most people are struggling to adjust to; from lockdown to curfew, wearing masks, sanitizing or washing hands, no shaking hands or hugging to social distancing among others. Everyone has been affected by covid 19 pandemic in one way or another. One of the major negative effects is loss, could be; loss of a job, a loved one and even anticipatory loss of a loved one who is either sick of covid, business, normalcy, social interactions, freedom, predictable future dealing with the loss of a loved one among other issues. This said, it is vital to acknowledge that different people deal with loss differently both individually and corporately. This article looks at Kubler Ross’s stages of dealing with loss and grief in relation to covid; denial, anger, bargaining, despair and acceptance. It is important to acknowledge that the stages are not fixed. They may or may not occur following the order above, some people may not experience all the stages while others experience all, some experience specific stages multiple times while others only once or never.

Denial

One can live in denial of emotional and even physical pain and this delays the opportunity for early intervention and the fight to survive hence preserving life.

Denial in dealing with COVID_19 manifests in the following ways;

• The government and people are blowing this COVID - 19 issue out of proportion
• It is like the normal flu
• I’m not old, my immune system is strong, I don’t have a pre-existing health issue that would predispose me.
• Covid 19 does not exist

Anger

Anger is a common feeling when people are undergoing any form of loss or grief. This is the time one asks themselves the question “why me,”they get the feeling of “life is unfair”. Instead of dealing with the issue at hand, sometimes people; put blame on others, they may become hostile, could refuse to obey rules, externalize the problem and sometimes it could go as far as experiencing power plays.

During this COVID -19 pandemic, anger looks like;

• This pandemic has been caused by an external country, whose government should have contained the virus to prevent it from spreading to other parts of the world.
• Why am I the one who lost my job and yet others are still working, did it have to affect me directly?
• The hospital did not take good care of my patient that’s why he/she succumbed, why are other people getting cured of covid?
• I don’t care what the government says about staying at home, I’m going to work today.
• I’m bored and feeling anxious, let me call my friends to come over for drinks so that we catch up. No need to follow government regulations

Bargaining

This occurs once one has processed denial and is in the process of accepting the reality as it is and is able to do away with the belief that they have control. Essentially in this stage, one tries to compromise to find an easier and less painful way.

During this covid pandemic bargaining looks like;

• All these will end soon before December and we shall go back to living our normal lives
• I can tell if someone is sick from seeing how they look. I will be fine so long as I stay around people who look healthy.
• I hardly visit crowded places, so I’m safe from it.
• It is ok to spend time with others so long as they wash their hands, wear masks and you observe social distance

Despair

Despair and depression crop in when the truth eventually sinks in and there is no more room for denial. At this point one feels hopeless, powerless, inability to control what is going on around the person and all seems lost. At this stage, one is bound to feel sorry for themselves. There is also regret at the fact that the effort put in at the bargaining stage did not yield any fruits. Some people withdraw from life, feel numb and not want to come out of bed. The world might seem too much and devastating for an individual. Some may have suicidal ideations since they don’t see the point of soldiering on.

During this covid pandemic, despair sounds like;

• I don’t feel like leaving my bed. Even if I do, where will I go given that I cannot drink with my friends? I cannot go to school or work.
• COVID does not look like it is ending soon. My life will never go back to normal.
• I have incurred losses as a result of closing down my business, I will never recover.
• I’m not able to pay school fees for this semester, I will never finish campus
• There is nothing worth living for anymore, I just want to sleep and never wake up again
• I have no control over how covid is affecting my life, I feel helpless.
• I have lost a loved one, will this pain ever go away? I don’t think I can live without them.

Acceptance

This is the point where you make peace with the fact that you cannot change whatever is happening around you. Accept the new normal and live with it. Accept that there will be good and bad days

Acceptance during covid pandemic sounds like;

• The world will change, but maybe when all this is over, people will be better human beings
• I cannot control COVID - 19, but I can play my part by washing my hands, wearing a mask, observing social distance and being positive.
• I might not be in a position to meet my friends physically, but we communicate via video call, hold social sessions via zoom, call and chat. I can also work from home if I cannot go to work.
• Make peace with having online classes. I am lucky enough to be going on with classes albeit online. My academic life is not at a standstill.
• Even though they are gone physically, they will forever be in my heart. I will forever cherish the good memories we created together.

How to cope with loss and grief during this COVID -19 period;

Acknowledge and accept all your feelings. Acknowledge the pain caused by the loss then allow yourself to go feel the pain, go through the process and give yourself time to recover. Do not rush, recover at your own speed. Denying the loss does not reduce the pain, but instead lengthens the suffering.

Talk about your loss. This can help lower the burden of grief as a problem shared is half solved. You can reach out to family and friends through voice or video calls, chat, text and any other online platform.

Take stock of what is going well. Journal or write down about your strengths and good moments each day to monitor your progress. Even as you do this, be cognizant of the fact healing occurs in difference phases as described above and you move into and out of different feelings. Be aware of your triggers even as you pen down your feelings and thoughts each day. Be aware of any form of relapse.

Pay attention to the things you have control over. Like Being sad and the negative thoughts running through your head, stay at home as much as you can, washing your hands or sanitizing as often as is necessary, keeping social distance, eating healthy foods, exercise and maintaining a daily schedule

Self-Care. Get plenty of rest, eat regular meals even if you don’t feel like it, exercise regularly and allow yourself to be happy when you fee

Be aware of any helpful resources available. You can seek online counseling by sending an email to counsel@usiu.ac.ke to talk to a therapist, job advertisements online if job hunting, business ideas, spiritual support from your spiritual leaders, medical assistance in the event of health related challenges among other resources.

When to Seek Help

Feelings of grief are natural reactions to significant losses. If these feelings persist, your mood does not improve or worsens, or you feel unable to function and perform basic daily activities, reach out for help.

Adopted from psychology today https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/love-and-sex-in-the-digital-age/202003/covid-19-and-the-grief-process

By Counseling Department

In order to make progress in life and move forward you need to understand your own beliefs and which beliefs are limiting. When you believe your life will be hard, your mind will concentrate on this belief and will search for evidence to back up this belief. This happens all the time, have you ever been searching for a book saying to yourself “I can’t find the book” you look everywhere without being able to locate the book, this leads you to becoming angry and frustrated. Your friend comes in and tells you that there on the table in front of you – the place you checked three times! By telling yourself you can’t find the book, stops you from finding it.

Another example is when you meet someone you fancy for the first time, as you tell yourself that you are attracted to this person, you look for the things you like about them; a nice smile, funny and interesting. With some relationships, after a couple of dates you change your belief from “I really fancy this person” to “I don’t think this relationship will work out” after changing your belief you start to look for new evidence to back up this new belief; hairy ears, overweight, always late and uses bad perfume.

As you will agree, the same happens with our own limiting beliefs we tell ourselves something negative about ourselves and then look for evidence to back this up. To challenge your beliefs, question the evidence that backs up your limiting belief, look for the generalizations, check to see what is missing-essentially create doubt in your belief.

As you can see, once you start questioning your limiting beliefs you will start to create doubt which will lead to you changing your beliefs.

You need to ask yourself “what is my limiting belief stopping me from doing?” Is my limiting belief doing more harm than good? If I had a new belief or could change a limiting belief would this help me move forward? Would I be happier? Would I feel I have more choices?

Take your limiting beliefs and update them, giving yourself a new opportunity.

See the following examples:

If you are struggling with such limiting beliefs, reach out to the Counseling Center and have a discussion with our counselors, we are ready to walk with you in creating a new way of thinking and having better beliefs that will help you to make progress in your life.

By the Counseling Department

A romance scam occurs when a criminal or a criminal gang creates a fake online profile and feigns romantic interest in another online user. They often target lonely victims looking for love and romance on dating websites, social media accounts, classified sites and other online forums. They work to develop a relationship as quickly as possible. A romance scam involves feigning romantic intentions towards a victim, gaining the victim's affection, and then using that goodwill to get the victim to send money to the scammer under false pretenses or to commit fraud against the victim. Fraudulent acts may involve access to the victim's money, bank accounts, credit cards, passports, e-mail accounts, or national identification numbers; or forcing the victims to commit financial fraud on their behalf.

These scams are often perpetrated by organized criminal gangs, who work together to take money from multiple victims at a time.
Does it happen in Nairobi or in Kenya? Yes, it does and some of our students have been victims.

5 Ways to Spot a Romance Scammer

1. Quick to call it love - The goal is to manipulate victim emotionally as quickly as possible before they realize they are being scammed. They also use endearing love terms such as “dear” etc. Scammers are very adept at knowing how to "play" their victims – sending love poems, sex games on emails, building up a "loving relationship" with many promises of "one day we will be married".
2. Their profile contains vague or few images across platforms - They often impersonate someone else by creating personal profiles using stolen photographs of attractive people for the purpose of asking others to contact them. This is often known as catfishing. They are likely to have few pictures of person they are impersonating.
3. Asks for money - They are skilled at making up believable stories, such as an emergency to manipulate victim to send money. No matter how convincing the reason, it’s likely you are being scammed.
4. Scammer wants to move to a more personal communication platform - Dating sites have parameters to detect scammers. Therefore, scammers may try to get private communication through email or text. This is a dangerous step. The safest action is to continue communicating through public app till you meet them in person. If they pressure you to give your telephone number, consider it a red flag.
5. The scammers make promises to meet in person but rarely meet the victims face to face or even in a video call. They deceive their intended victims by making plausible-sounding excuses about their unwillingness to show their faces, such as by saying that they cannot meet yet because they are temporarily traveling or have a broken web camera. When they plan for a meet up, scammers use emergencies to keep you interested and prevent you from questioning their identity.
6. Their stories are elaborate and emotional quite convincing to someone blinded. These fabricated emergencies lead them to ask for financial help. Communications are exchanged between the scammer and victim over a period of time until the scammer feels they have connected with the victim enough to ask for money. Scammers prey on the victims' false sense of a relationship to lure them into sending money. They request for money for their airplane ticket, fuel or other emergencies.
7. Victims may be invited to travel to the scammer's country; in some cases, the victims arrive with asked-for gift money for family members or bribes for corrupt officials, only to be beaten and robbed or murdered.
8. The scam usually ends when the victim realizes they are being scammed or stops sending money.

How to Protect Yourself from Romance Scammers

• Pay attention to red flags-pay attention to what you see as off things and follow your intuition. A genuine interest will understand and appreciate your cautiousness and safety. Scammers urge you to trust them no matter what.
• Allow relationships to develop slowly and naturally-It’s natural to want to experience a storybook romance. But authentic relationships develop over time. If the person is moving too quickly, consider it a red flag.
• Set up video chat to verify identity-since scammers take identity of someone else, one easy way to verify is a video chat.
• Research person you are messaging-research your cyber sweetheart on other platforms like Facebook, LinkedIn etc. You can also do a reverse image search using a photo of them. Download and right click to copy then paste image URL. If image appears on a stock photo site, they might just be a scammer.
• Never send money to someone you don’t really know-develop a full trusting relationship with someone before you send money. If an online partner is asking for money, report to authorities.
• Share feelings with trusted family or friend-sometimes it’s difficult to see manipulation when it is happening in the moment. It’s always good to share. Even if you can’t see suspicious activity, consulting someone can view it from another perspective.

What to do when scammed

1. Trust your intuition completely and stop communication immediately lest you reveal personal information or get entangled with scammers’ tactics.
2. If money has been sent, try to see if it can be recovered; either through Mpesa or just get another source of money transfer.
3. Report the scammer to telephone line service e.g.: Safaricom, Airtel in order for them to be blocked.
4. Remember, falling victim can happen to anyone. It’s normal to feel ashamed and embarrassed, remember perfectly intelligent people get scammed every day.
5. Talking about your experience lessens the pain and helps protect others in future.

Source: What to Know About Romance Scams | Consumer Advice (ftc.gov)

By Lucy Kung'u & Lydia Winda

The Coronavirus pandemic has been experienced around the world for more than a year and has had a major effect on economies of countries, families, people’s health ranging from physical to mental among other effects. Several countries put various measures in place to avert the spread of the novel virus among them; lockdown, wearing of masks, washing of hands or sanitizing, banned or controlled social gatherings, social distancing among other measures.

Online learning has become one of the new normal situations that students have had to adjust to during this period in the bid to mitigate the spread of the novel COVID-19 virus worldwide. This has been a big challenge to the learning process. Additionally, studies show that mental health related issues among them but not limited to; anxiety, depression, post-traumatic stress disorder, prolonged loss and grief related issues, alcohol and substance abuse and acute stress disorder are on the rise given the already frail mental health status of many people. Besides mental health related issues, there are also other challenges like; technology, internet connectivity and family related issues among others.

What to do as a student

• For a good plan of different activities in your life, plan and manage your time well, self- control/discipline is very critical.
• To actively participate and be engaged in online learning, interact with the topic for the week by reading before class. This will also help with focus and motivation for your class.
• Ensure you have done all the assignments before class begins.
• Attitude towards learning is a strong driver for academic achievement. If you have any reservations about online classes, discuss and clear them for you to exude positive attitude towards online learning.

To avoid feeling isolated and disconnected during online courses, you can:

• Reach out to your friends, classmates and family members.
• Offer support to especially those;
  • Who have pre-existing mental health conditions;
  • Who have experienced any form of loss during this period i.e. loss of a loved one, job, business, break up and any other form of loss;
  • Who have been affected directly by the pandemic;
  • Classmates who used to be active in class then stopped being active;
  • Who miss classes;
  • Who post suggestive posts on their social media accounts;
  • Who used to be active in group work, but stopped.
• Be a good friend to someone by being accountability partners.
• Inform the lecturer with the student’s permission if it is an issue that requires a lecturer’s support.
• Refer your friends who need counseling to the university’s Counseling Department.

As a lecturer for effective online learning, take note of the changing roles occasioned by online learning that require adaptation:

• Start class sessions by checking up on your students.
• Follow up on those who miss classes either directly or through their class representative or friends in class.
• Notice any changes or struggles exhibited by students in class.
• Try and balance rigor and support.
• Apply attention attraction strategies for students to focus on learning
• Use language(s) that make the students hopeful of coming back to class e.g. when we go back to physical learning.
• Create time to talk about the pandemic, the student’s fears and what they are struggling with in relation to the pandemic.
• Assure your students that you are there for them just in case they need to talk to you.
• Encourage them to form a class WhatsApp group where they can keep in touch as a class.
• Integrate multimedia (video, audio, text discussion, graphics etc.) that will make class sessions engaging and interesting to you and learners.
• Be learner centered in your approach.
• Refer for counseling those who present with issues that require counseling based on your assessment.

It is important to be cognizant that times are tough for everyone including the lecturers. Both students and lecturers should try their best to make class sessions manageable for both parties that way, you make online class sessions bearable. Online classes are tough, may involve a heavy workload, technology issues, and changing student–teacher interactions but doable with the support and collaboration of both students and lecturers.

Feel free to contact the Counseling Center through counsel@usiu.ac.ke or 0730116748/750/797 for psychosocial support.

References:

https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/0047239516661713

http://www.oecd.org/coronavirus/policy-responses/strengthening-online-learning-when-schools-are-closed-the-role-of-families-and-teachers-in-supporting-students-during-the-covid-19-crisis-c4ecba6c/,

https://core.ac.uk/download/pdf/81119765.pdf

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S2214139118300398

By the Counselling Centre

“The greatest disease in the World today is not TB or leprosy; it is being unwanted, unloved, and uncared for. We can cure physical diseases with medicine, but the only cure for loneliness, despair, and hopelessness is LOVE - Mother Theresa.

It is okay to experience loneliness, loneliness is a human experience, a consequence of being a social being in a complicated world. Naturally, humans are relational beings and they love the connection especially that of being around other people, feeling accepted, getting encouraged, having conversations etc. This is very normal, don’t be afraid to embrace the feeling.

If you are feeling lonely because of isolation due to COVID-19, understand that you are not alone in this situation. Several other people are holed up in family homes/rooms, hospital isolation rooms and/or other spaces they did not choose to be in. Some people have even found themselves in other countries, cities, towns and places they were only meant to be in temporarily. This awareness and understanding will help you to stop blaming themselves and take it as a health requirement which, however uncomfortable, is emphasized for a good reason. It is important to protect oneself and loved ones; and the community/country at large. Each person's actions make the difference. Loneliness should encourage solidarity, being kinder and being attuned to people and appreciative of what we have.

Loneliness does not always mean absence of a person or people; it means absence of connection. Some people are lonely because they have low self- esteem or poor social skills and have difficulties connecting with other people; or they feel their company is not valuable to others. Some people feel unwanted and unattractive or ‘boring' hence feelings may be heightened during this period. Whatever the cause, find some counsel online, use positive thought strategies, pray regardless of your faith or religion, do some positive self - talk, smile, dance, and be tenderer with yourself.

What you can do to manage loneliness

It is important to acknowledge that different activities work for different people hence it is important for you to identify what works for you.

Stay active by;

Staying connected with your family members and friends either virtually or physically. Ensure you observe government directives during physical meetings.

Doing something meaningful that will make you experience a form of satisfaction e.g. volunteer work.

Read on areas that interest you. You can also watch programs, TED talks, shows that excite you.

Online engagement in groups that discuss topics that are of interest to you e.g. DIYs, music

Listen and create music if you are a music lover.

You can practice artwork if you love art i.e. painting, crocheting, knitting drawing or origami.

Take up online classes to keep you busy on areas that interest you.

Engage in soothing activities like steamy shower, hot chocolate as they comfort from loneliness.

Engage in outdoor activities like going for nature walks, picnic, cycling, hikes among other fun outdoor activities. Ensure you observe government directives if going with friends.

Have a friend or family member you can confide in about how you feel. Having a strong support system comes handy while dealing with such.

Things to note

Use your time wisely during this period, as solitude enriches creative work. Many people, especially teenagers and adults, have not created or afforded such a “free" period of time for many years. One could feel uncomfortable and disoriented, but it’s best to use this time to plan, set goals, review goals and progress. So while it lasts, a lot of positive and productive stuff can come out of such a time which will lessen feelings of loneliness. One can literally take it as their reflection period or ‘quiet time’ and if used wisely, it can compensate for what has been lost in many years. If anyone is in isolation and feels lonely, take this time to plan to come out better, more organized and focused.

Find things to be grateful for. In this time of uncertainty, there are complaints and negative events around the world. Some people may have lost loved ones, lost jobs, forced to take salary cuts etc. For someone who is in isolation, it would reduce their feelings of loneliness if they proactively chose to be more grateful. Make gratitude your friend. Journal about the things you’re grateful for. Better still, one can speak them out. Be grateful for who you are. Grateful for your health. For your loved ones. Grateful that you are still employed. Grateful that your symptoms are manageable and there is hope. Grateful that this too shall pass. Grateful that you are alive!

Work with a structure. Periods of lack of activity can easily attract feelings of loneliness. One can make a plan for each day and ensure they have at least two or three goals to accomplish in any given day. For instance, wake up, pray, exercise, take a shower, video call family/friends, read up a favorite book/chapter, listen to a podcast etc. The structure can change each day but at least do something productive. Occupy the mind and body productively. Loneliness, if not well managed can lead to depression, a form of anxiety, alcohol and substance abuse, stress, powerlessness, physical illnesses due low immunity and suicidal behavior.

If you feel overwhelmed and need help, contact a counselor. You can call 0730116748/750 or email: counsel@usiu.ac.ke

Identify what is causing you stress

Stress is our response to interaction between external events/demands (what is out there) and internal psychological or physiological response. It can be caused by such things as conflict, loss, uncertainty especially if you are not sure of how to do something, or you have over committed and you are not achieving set goals.

Know and identify the effects of stress on you as shown in the table below:

Monitor yourself to be able to tell when you are getting stressed
Ensure you use positive coping skills to manage the stress. For example; reach out for help, take time to relax, journal what is happening to you and think of ways to manage the problem or stressor, do physical exercises and also relaxation exercises that involve you just breathing in and out in a relaxed way.

If it is relationship stress, use assertive communication, set boundaries and enhance conflict resolution and management skills. (You may have learnt or will learn this in your SUS class).

If it is work/school/life balance: quality time management is key, have a plan or schedule, delegating where you can be it at work or home will help.

If it is a loss through death, separation or breakup and you are grieving, seek support either from family, friends the counselors here in school or near your residence.

Practice Self-care
Basic self-care will keep your immune system strong and your emotional reserves full. Get enough sleep. Exercise regularly. Eat well. Try mindfulness apps.
Find activities that engage different parts of yourself. Do something physical like dancing. Occupy your mind with puzzles. Engage your senses with hot baths or fragrant candles.

Look for tasks that are not productive that you can postpone or simply eliminate from your to-do list.

Find ways to focus
You might feel unmotivated now. Recognize that the current circumstances are hard for everyone. Don’t judge yourself; just do the best you can. Establish a routine. Get up, go to bed and do your work at the same time every day. Frequent breaks can help you re-engage in your work. Try to create a separate work space, although you should reserve your sleeping area for sleeping. If family members are distracting you, use “I statements” to explain the problem--“I’m worried about my exam next week”—and work together to develop solutions.

Seek out social support
To combat mental health issues, come together with your friends, class mates, Peer Counselors either physically or through technology. We are aware that many of you have WhatsApp groups, keep connecting and keeping in touch.

Even something as simple as turning on your webcam during virtual classes can help you and others feel more connected.

Help others cope
Your classmates and family members could be struggling. You don’t have to fix their problems. It’s enough to let them know they’re not alone.

If you’re a psychology major, graduate or undergraduate or you are a peer counselor help the other students but be sure to address your own concerns and ask your supervisors for help.

Find ways to manage disappointment
For those of us who have internship, dissertation defense or graduation ceremony, or other important events, be patient and be ready to make adjustments. For those awaiting graduation, celebrate but embark on the next phase of your life. Work closely with the USIU-Africa Career and Placement Office (email: careeroffice@usiu.ac.ke) to identify a job or look out for opportunity for job creation and also volunteerism in this period.

Limit your media consumption
Of course, it’s good to stay informed, especially about what’s happening in your area.

But too much news — especially social media — can add to your anxiety. To avoid being overwhelmed, set limits on your media consumption and smartphone use. Cut through misinformation by relying on reputable sources

Focus on things you can control
Other people may be disobeying the rules or doing other things that add to your stress. We ask you to model good behavior and stay safe yourself, recognizing that you can’t control what other people do. You can only control your own thoughts, feelings and behaviors. Another thing you can’t control? The uncertainty about what comes next. Instead of worrying about the future, focus on solving immediate problems now, focus on your classes, you have more time saved since you don’t have to commute to school, use it to go deeper into the concepts you are learning.

Use the library resources provided and carry out research for your classwork assignments immediately your lecturers issue them and also research on other areas of interest.

It is time to learn, grow and expand our knowledge to be better people.

Stay away from Alcohol and Drug abuse
We are in a time when home deliveries for alcohol and even drugs is taking place. We may find ourselves do more alcohol or drugs now that some of us are alone and may have self-control issues or may be having some struggles because of the changes brought about by Covid-19.

Small changes can make a big difference in reducing your chances of having alcohol-related problems. Here are some strategies to try, and you can add what works for you at the end.

Steps to take to be Alcohol and Drug Abuse Free
• Be Aware of your Thoughts
Notice that thought that makes you want to engage in Alcohol and Drug abuse and know that you have a choice to SAY No to yourself. Know your "no." You're likely to have friends who may not be in school or are yet to resume and they may offer a drink at times when you don't want. Have a polite, convincing "no, thanks" ready. The faster you can say no to these offers, the less likely you are to give in. If you hesitate, it allows you time to think of excuses to go along. Build your drink refusal skills.

• Know the limits
The Frequent use, how much, how long and reasons for use of alcohol and drugs is what poses a great danger

Keep track of how much you are drinking and work towards slowing down and eventually stopping the drinking, so that you can concentrate on school work.

If you must drink, Set goals. Decide how many days a week you want to drink and how many drinks you'll have on those days. It's a good idea to have some days when you don't drink. People who always stay within the low-risk limits when they drink have the lowest rates of alcohol-related problems.

Find alternatives. If drinking has occupied a lot of your time, then fill free time by developing new, healthy activities, hobbies, and relationships, or renewing ones you've missed. If you have counted on alcohol to be more comfortable in social situations, manage moods, or cope with problems, then seek other, healthy ways to deal with those areas of your life. Remember, the Counseling center is open and available for you.

Avoid "triggers." What triggers your urge to drink? If certain people or places make you drink even when you don't want to, deal with the unresolved issues or if possible try to avoid them. If certain activities, times of day, or feelings trigger the urge, plan something else to do instead of drinking. If drinking at home is a problem, keep little or no alcohol at home.

Plan to handle urges. When you cannot avoid a trigger and an urge hits, consider these options: Remind yourself of your reasons for not drinking (it can help to carry them in writing or store them in an electronic message where you can access easily). Or talk things through with someone you trust. Or get involved with a healthy, distracting activity, such as physical exercise or a hobby that doesn't involve drinking. Or, instead of fighting the feeling, accept it and ride it out without giving in, knowing that it will soon crest like a wave and pass. Also, see the short module to help you handle urges to drink.

• Know that Legality doesn’t mean harmlessness
As much as alcohol and cigarette smoking is legal, irresponsible and excessive use is harmful. Illegal drug use and abuse is harmful to your health and life in general.

• Maintain your Brain Power
Value and Protect the executive functioning of the brain (memory, learning, long term planning and investment, impulse control) which gets affected by Marijuana use, excessive alcohol consumption, smoking, illegal drug use and abuse of prescription drugs. Let us prevent substance abuse disorders, negative effect like violence and even psychosis.

Don’t feel alone, USIU-Africa cares and are available and ready to serve you.

By Lydia Winda

Mid- Semester Exams are around the corner and probably you are experiencing exam fever especially for those doing online exams for the first time. Below is a guide on how to prepare for USIU-Africa’s online exams;

PRIOR TO THE SCHEDULED EXAM

1. Read and understand the test guidelines i.e.
   • Make sure you have access to your blackboard
   • Know the time and date for your scheduled exam
   • Know the duration of your exam
   • Know any additional instructions set by your lecturer
2. Know the format of your exam i.e. is it MCQs, short answer questions or essay format.
3. Make sure you have a working device that you’ll be using to take your exam (laptop, desktop, tablet etc.) and they are well charged.
4. Make sure you have downloaded and tested out Respondus Lockdown & Monitor as instructed by your lecturer. If the exam is being administered via lockdown, log in at least ten minutes in advance to alleviate any challenges that might me experienced.
5. Confirm if a webcam is required for your exam so that you acquire one and test it before the exam.
6. Study - Even though it’s an online exam, prepare for it and study as you normally would when preparing for a physical exam.
7. If you don’t treat it with the same respect, then you might go in with a bad mentality and this is likely to affect your performance.
8. Find a good spot to take the test - Make sure you've turned off all distractions like the television, phone, social media, and all notifications. Gather all the things you will need, including, notebook or paper, pens or pencils to work out mathematical problems or to jot notes.
9. Make sure you have your lecturer’s email address or phone number just in case you experience any challenges during the exam.

DURING THE EXAM;

• Find a quiet place that you’ll be taking the exam
• Read the instructions first before starting the exam
• Keep an eye on the timer always
• Always save your answer before moving to the next
• Plan your answers, start with easy questions first that will take less time and move on to harder ones depending on whether the exam allows you to go back to previous questions or not.

TECHNICIAL PROBLEMS;

• Don’t panic, stay calm and take a deep breath
• Call the USIU-Africa help desk and IT and ask for assistance on 0730-116333 or Whatsapp chat them on 0735-000377 or email helpdesk@usiu.ac.ke
• Call your lecturer and ask for a way forward

All the best in your exams!

Best Wishes

Feeling: sad, anxious, irritable, tired all the time, like you are in a crisis
Thinking: Nobody likes me, I can’t do anything right, I am a failure, I am losing interest in my academic journey
Drinking more alcohol than anticipated or increasing drug use
Having trouble sleeping or sleeping too much?
Having trouble with your eating?
There is help for you.

Call the Counseling Center on +254 730 116 748 /797 /746 /791 /750 and ask to be connected to a Professional Psychological Counselor or a Peer Counselor.

We will listen to you, explore and come up with ways to help you feel better.

By Lucy Kung’u

At this time of uncertainty, we are facing many stressors in our lives notably;

• The second wave of the Coronavirus pandemic, not only in Kenya but the whole world;
• Working from home, where there could be conflict with parents, siblings or roommates;
• A lot of loss’ be it of loved ones, friendships or relationships and more so loss as a result of COVID – 19 with the accompanying fear of self-stigma, social stigma and discrimination;
• Loss of social status due to financial constraints occasioned by loss of jobs and businesses;
• Academic pressures as we near the end of the semester or completion of studies at whatever level hence we are thinking of our life after completing our studies in these unprecedented times;
• Separation from friends or family with feelings of loneliness

It is important that we be aware of how the different stressors are impacting on us and what we need to do to manage stress.

What is stress?

Stress is our response to interaction between external events/demands (what is out there) and internal psychological or physiological responses.

It can be caused by such things as conflict, sense of injustice or unfairness, constraints (lack or limited resources, unmet needs, loneliness), high demands in the midst of time pressure, distractors/barriers or differences in beliefs about the demands in our lives, uncertainty (thinking the worst will happen- fear of harm, pain, loss of face or loss of loved ones), distress intolerance (I can’t stand this) especially if you are not sure of how to do something, or over commitment yet you are not achieving set goals, or you are not getting what you think is important to you, personality clash especially when it comes to differences in patience, sense of time urgency, flexibility, setting realistic goals, competitiveness, ability to calm down or get aroused by stressors.

People deal with stress in different ways. Some avoid the stressor by running away, remaining passive, blaming themselves, doing nothing in a helpless way or dealing with the stressors in an aggressive way. Others accept, adjust, adapt and advance, which is the preferred way of managing stress.

How to manage stress

Stress can be managed by:

Being aware of the signs and symptoms of stress, and knowing and identifying the effects of stress on you as shown in the table below:

However, check with your doctor or health care provider to ensure there are not any other causes of the physical symptoms.

Monitor yourself to be able to tell when you are getting stressed so that you can manage stress and focus on what needs to be done in the present moment

Ensure you use positive coping skills to manage the stress. For example; reach out for help, take time to relax, journal what is happening to you and think of ways to manage the problem or stressor, do physical exercises and also relaxation exercises that involve you just breathing in and out in a relaxed way.

If it is relationship stress, use assertive communication, set boundaries and enhance conflict resolution and management skills. If learning or working from home and family members are distracting you, use “I statements” to explain the problem--“I’m worried about my exam next week”—and work together to develop solutions.

If it is work/school/life balance: enhance time management, have a plan or schedule, delegating where you can or will help.

If it is a loss and you are grieving, seek support either from family, friends, and counselors here in school or near your residence.

Practice self-care. Basic self-care will keep your immune system strong and your emotional reserves full. Get enough sleep. Exercise regularly. Eat well. Try mindfulness apps.

Find activities that engage different parts of yourself. Do something physical like dancing. Occupy your mind with puzzles, singing. Engage your senses with hot baths or fragrant candles.

Look for tasks you can postpone or simply eliminate from your to-do list.

Seek out social support. Having to stay home can be lonely. To combat isolation, come together with your class mates or graduate school cohort via technology. Many of you have WhatsApp groups, keep chatting. Something as simple as turning on your webcam during virtual classes can help you and others feel more connected.

Help others cope. Your classmates and family members may be going through challenges. You may not be able to fix their problems. It’s enough to let them know they’re not alone.

Be patient. For those who have internships, dissertation defenses or are thinking of graduation or other important events, be patient, and be ready to make adjustments as we await the end of this pandemic. For those awaiting graduation, work closely with the Career and Placement office to identify a job or look out for opportunity for job creation in this period. also consider volunteerism, which will give you work experience.

Limit your media consumption. To avoid being overwhelmed, set limits on your media consumption and smartphone use. Cut through misinformation by relying on reputable sources of truthful and useful information. Remember the internet has a lot of information and we should look out for credible information and opportunities.

Focus on things you can control. Other people may be disobeying the rules about physical distancing or doing other things that add to your stress. We ask you to model good behavior and stay safe yourself, recognize that you can’t control what other people do. You can only control your own thoughts, feelings and behaviors. Another thing you can’t control, the uncertainty about what comes next. Instead of worrying about our ambiguous future, focus on solving immediate problems now, focus on your classes, you have more time saved since you don’t have to commute to school, use it to go deeper into the concepts you are learning, identify or discover your talents or even innovate.

Use the library resources provided and carry out research for your classwork assignments let us not wait for last minute rush. Remember, it is time to learn, grow and expand our knowledge

Stay away from alcohol and drug abuse. We are in a time when home deliveries for alcohol and even drugs is taking place. We may find ourselves do more alcohol or drugs now that some of us are alone and may have self-control issues or may be having some struggles because of the changes brought about by COVID- 19. Small changes can make a big difference in reducing your chances of having alcohol-related problems.

Be Aware of your Thoughts, know your limits, and maintain your brain power. Value and protect the executive functioning of the brain (memory, learning, long term planning and investment, impulse control) which gets affected by the negative effects of stress. Quiet your mind, regulate your emotions, change your thinking to change your life. Be willing to accept, adjust, adapt, and advance. Remember to always find the humour in things, and laugh.

Prevention, reduction, management, tolerance, optimism, positivity, getting professional help is what we all need. Don’t feel alone, we care and are available and ready to serve you.

Mental illness awareness means acceptance and love rather than judgment and shame; it means an end to the stigma and the beginning of hope.

- Annie Slease

By Lucy Kung’u

Every year, October 10 is set aside to mark World Mental Health Day. This year’s Mental Health Week theme is Strengthening Our Community – Live, Learn, Work and Play. According to the World Health Organization (WHO), mental health is a state of well-being in which an individual realizes his or her own abilities, can cope with the normal stresses of life, can work productively, and is able to make a contribution to his or her community. It is all about how people think, feel, and behave. WHO stresses that mental health is not just about the absence of a mental disorders or disabilities. Furthermore, mental health can adversely affect relationships, our day to day lives and even physical health.

Risk factors for mental health disorders or illness

It is important to note that everyone is at a risk of mental health related issues or illnesses. No one is immune to mental health issues. It affects people from all walks of life, young old, male female, different races, rich, poor etc. Some of the risk factors that have been identified include:

- Frustration, which is defined as a feeling that you get when someone, something or a situation you cannot control or change blocks, prevents or stops your effort to get what you desire which you perceive as important to you;

- Social or interpersonal related issues, based on one’s attachment style, betrayals, neglect, break up of relationships, conflict, violence, among others;

- Financial issues, including the lack of finances or lack financial management skills, debts etc.;

- Current or past traumas, which are experiences that overwhelm your day to day coping skills e.g. stress, loss of a loved one, a job, a friendship, marriage, natural or man-made disasters;

- Lifestyle choices that negatively affect one’s life e.g. alcohol and drug abuse;

- Developmental disorders that may affect one’s learning, relationships, sexuality, control, personality, biological factors like - genetics, brain chemistry, brain structure, and another medical conditions like terminal illnesses, environmental factors among others.

Prevention and treatment

In the wake of increased mental health related issues, talking about ways of managing mental health is key. Some of the notable ways of preventing and treating mental health related issues include

- Being aware of mental health related issues.

- Embracing change, and remembering that no situation is permanent, and this is just a phase you can get through. This goes hand in hand with accepting situations that you cannot change, as this helps you face the threat, adjust, integrate and adapt to the changes that are in your best interest.

- Reappraising your habits and routines and clarifying your personal and social values.

- Talk to someone about how you feel. Talk to a friend, a family member or a colleague.

- Try to be creative. It helps in distracting you from having negative thoughts.

- Practicing mindfulness by taking a minute to stop what you are doing, focus on your breathing and think of a calming thought, image or belief. It is an incredibly powerful tool.

- Be kind to yourself. Take each hour at a time.

- Avoid putting too much pressure on yourself to perform.

- Self-care is important. Know when your body yearns for a break and take it. Go for a holiday, change environments among other activities. Create time to go for nature walks. Enjoy the beauty of the environment and take pictures. When not at work, rest and get enough sleep.

- Learn to just focus on what you can do and have control over.

- Be aware when you are about to react in ways that are prohibited.

- Reflection will help you to be in the present moment and remain sensitive to the demands and changes brought about by the issue you are facing. Deeply connect with your inner soul, strength and resources.

- A solution focused mind set and high frustration tolerance levels will help keep the peace.

- Stay away from substances that are likely to affect your judgment, reaction time or would cause you to act irrationally, violently or cause brain damage e.g. misuse of prescription drugs, excessive consumption of alcohol, use of illegal and hard drugs.

- Learn to wait and be patient as things settle down, learn to regulate all the negative emotions.

- Use relaxation techniques; meditation, breathing exercises, help restore balance in your life.

- Gratitude and compassion – both of these not only help to lower stress levels; they also help boost immunity and improve perspective. It takes only a few seconds to think of something you are grateful for.

- Flexibility is key. Change your thinking, get the facts to be able to correct wrong perceptions or beliefs, move from negative thinking “I feel helpless, there is nothing I can do” to positive Thinking “I can take it one day at a time, I will restart small to get to where I was or I will do things differently”.

If the feelings are persistent, seek help from a professional, like a psychologist or counselor who will help you with psychosocial issues or a psychiatrist for a biological issue that needs medication.

What to do to help

Despite the fact that mental health awareness is on the rise, stigma associated with mental health is still with us. People need to be intentional about getting facts and playing their part in reducing mental related issues. Below are some of the things one can do to help;

By Sandra Joan

The Peer Educators and Counsellors Club (PECC) recently held an online webinar themed “Debunking Suicide". The event highlighted the issues surrounding depression and suicide, and featured panelists, including professionals in the field, who offered their insights on the topic.

With the suicide rate in Kenya having been on the rise lately, especially since the outbreak of COVID-19 pandemic, PECC found it necessary to have this two-day event and especially during the month of September in commemoration of Suicide Awareness & Prevention Week. Statistics have reported that between the months of March and June this year, over 500 people have committed suicide, a number said to be higher than what was reported in the entire year of 2020. A lot of young people, and in our case university students don’t know how to cope with stress which in turn leads to the development of depression and eventually leads to suicide.

Panelists at the event included Mr. Onyango Otieno (Founder – Afro Masculinity, Co-Founder – Fatuma’s Voice, Host & Producer – Afro Men Podcast, Certified Trauma Coach), Mr. Patrick Obel (Senior Counselor - USIU-Africa), and Lydia Winda (VCT Counselor & Club Patron). The moderators who doubled as the co-chairs of the event were Ms. Sandra Joan (Head of PR & Marketing –PECC) and Ms. Wandia King’ori (Vice Chairperson – PECC).

Speaking on mental wellness and masculinity in the African male context, Mr. Onyango Otieno noted that it was high time that society unlearned the unhealthy definitions of masculinity, and learn healthy communication, adding that it was important to encourage and celebrate the expression of emotions specially in boys from a young age.

The event also featured a panel session led by the University’s Counselling Office. Ms. Lydia Winda and Mr. Patrick Obel defined what suicide and depression were, and laid out the risk factors for the former while helping us break the stigma surrounding them. They educated the attendants on what the appropriate language use is when talking about a person with suicidal ideations or who has attempted to take their own life before. Ms. Noel Lusega (Senior Counselor at USIU-Africa) and Lucy Kung’u (Head Counselor at USIU- Africa) took the audience through the psychology behind suicide and answered questions from the attendants regarding how to be there for a loved one going through the same or for their family members after they have laid a loved one to rest.

The session ended with a testimonial session from a student, Ms. Joyce Wanjiku who spoke about her experience living with bipolar disorder and depression and helped humanize the person behind the suicidal attempts and verbalize what it feels like to actually have suicidal ideations.

By the Counselling Department

The global response to COVID -19 has changed daily life for many people, in addition to being a source of stress and adversity for them. To overcome the challenges posed by COVID-19 and its related traumas, it is important that we all build and strengthen our resilience.

What is resilience?

Resilience is the process of positive adaptation, withstanding or doing well in the face of adversity. It is the alleviation of suffering and the deliberate choice to have a balance between negative experiences (bad outcomes) and positive experiences with the choice of allowing oneself to lean more on the positives in life despite the challenges. It is also the ability to maintain relatively stable and healthy levels of psychological and physical functioning despite the adversity.

What people need to be resilient

To counter balance hardships in life and shield yourself from difficult times, there are core skills in life that one needs to be able to adapt, find solutions and therefore bounce back from the challenges, physically and psychologically ready to move on with life. These include:

By Leah Gichuki

The dictionary defines self-love as “One's positive attitude towards self or positive opinion or evaluation of oneself”. There are other ways that one can define what is and what is not, self-love.

Self-love is the value and the worth you experience within yourself separate and apart from anyone’s declaration of their love for you. It is generated from the inside and regulates the way we experience external love towards others and ourselves. Self-Love is not a self-obsession with oneself but a healthy respect for who you are and your value.

How do you know you love yourself in a healthy manner?
A healthy sense of self love is a baseline of how you allow others to treat you and a genesis of how we treat others. You cannot allow others to treat you beneath what you have established for yourself. An insufficient sense of Self Love can be observed for example, in situations where individual/s disrespect you but you keep on showing up for the same treatment every other time. The other side of insufficient self-love can be manifested through self-pompousness. To explain this, such a person finds a que in a place of service and in an effort to intimidate others, they throw words like “Do you know who I am?”. This is baffling because when one uses the phrase of do you know who I am others will think “…how will I know who you are if you don’t know who you are?”. Imagine the task of dealing with someone who does not know who they are. Other times the insufficient self-love will manifest through a person’s identification with labels and class…e.g. I drive the latest make of brand X or they use the address they live in. The question begs if all the superficial labels are taken away what is your Identity? It is not a label definitely but may indicate a lack of control of what is going on within the person.

Why is a healthy sense of love important?

• It informs your Identity. Identity is the source of emotional and social stability. If you know who you are and your own value, you will master your own individuality.
• It accelerates your self-actualization: Self-actualization is the process of maximizing and manifesting all that you can be in the world. This can be achieved by taking initiative and being the engine that drives you. Failure to be your own engine will lead to Self-Sabotage.
• It helps you set up healthy personal boundaries and enhances a healthy self-esteem. Self-esteem is an attitude born out of self-love. It is a combination of both feelings and actions for yourself.

Tips for developing Self Love

1. Learn how to evaluate and validate external data and information that you consume. Information is known to have an influence on the soul which affects our moods. For example; it is not true that for one to be considered beautiful you have to be light skinned and of a certain body proportion.
2. Speak good into your life: Statements that negate your state of being should never be entertained regardless of the source.
3. Control the free radicals in your subconscious mental processes; do not live in the past as both cannot be experienced one is gone and the other is yet to happen. This can be achieved through focused awareness of the present moment.
4. Build yourself before you embrace the world. Examine the people in your current circle; do they have your best interest at heart? If they disapprove or criticize you for real or imagined shortcomings how will it affect you? If the self-love is insufficient, the self-esteem may be negatively affected.

To sum it up, we define ourselves by what we give our hearts to. Therefore, sufficient self-love is evident when your self-esteem does not fluctuate due to situational experiences. If you love yourself and accept you then the world does not mark your value.

By the Counselling Department

The risk of suicide is a major global health concern. Suicidal thoughts can happen to anyone – the strong or the weak, all races, nationalities, ethnicity, careers and different walks of life.

Suicide is reported to be among the leading cause of death for teens and young adults. September is a Suicide Prevention Awareness Month. In this month we encourage us all to shift our perception, spread hope and share vital information on suicide. In line with the theme of the month “Together for Mental Health,” the goal is to ensure that individuals, friends and families have access to the resources they need to discuss suicide prevention and to seek help.

Suicidal thoughts, attempts and death by suicide is an indication of a serious mental health problem that needs intervention for those that struggle with suicidal thoughts, the survivors of attempted suicide and for family and friends of those who die from suicide. This is an appeal to all of us to bring our voices together to advocate for better mental health care, including an effective crisis response system.

Perception or meaning of death by suicide
It is worth noting that the meaning of suicide for a given individual can vary from one person to another. How people perceive death by suicide matters. There are people who will perceive it as rejection, abandonment, betrayal, disloyalty. For some the death is perceived as a choice with a critical interpersonal message from the deceased about the lack of worth or value of the relationship.
Effects of death by suicide on survivors of the loss
Death by suicide causes long lasting psychological experiences of distress, pain, anger, rage, directed at self or the deceased, self-doubt, guilt, anxiety, fear of being misjudged especially for parents, struggle with thoughts of being a failure, struggle with the why questions e.g. why didn’t he/she come to me for help? Why was I not in a position to keep him/her from dying? Struggle with meaning making, was this really a suicide or was it an accident, it puts other people at risk of suicide as well, it alters the quantity and quality of connection between the mourners and the social networks, in case it is a child, it strains the relationship between partners, erodes family cohesiveness and can bring about conflict, there is also a struggle with the stigma that the family/friends face as a result of the suicide. It can lead to feelings of alienation and estrangement from the deceased.

Some of the activities one can do;
Letter writing to the deceased or initiating a conversation with the deceased using “an empty chair” and more important going for counseling or therapy.

Warning signs for suicide – How we can tell someone is in danger of suicide

• Feelings of frustration, hopelessness, powerlessness
• Being trapped in emotional pain
• Strong feeling of worthlessness
• Feelings of not wanting to be a burden to others
• Withdrawal or isolation;
• Feeling alone/loneliness
• Strong feeling of shame, self-hatred, guilt, rage or talking about seeking revenge
• Extreme mood swings
• Depression/major depressive disorder
• Onset of treatment for depression
• Talking about death / talking of wanting to die
• Increased use of alcohol or reckless behavior
• Sleeping too much or too little
• Belief that no one cares if they live or die Saying things like “Nothing matters anymore,” “You’ll be better off without me,” or “Life isn’t worth living”
• Withdrawal from friends, family and normal activities
• Giving away personal possessions
• Talking as if they’re saying goodbye or going away forever
• Taking steps to tie up loose ends, like organizing personal papers or paying off debts
• Making or changing a will
• Stockpiling pills or obtaining a weapon
• Preoccupation with death
• Sudden cheerfulness or calm after a period of despondency,
• Dramatic changes in personality, mood and/or behavior
• Failed romantic relationship
• History of suicide attempts or other self-harming behaviors
• History of family/friend suicide or attempts

Talking to someone you are worried about
If you notice any of the warning signs or if you’re concerned someone is thinking about suicide, don’t be afraid to talk to them about it.

• Keep calm, pick a quiet time when you can talk in private
• Be direct, share specific signs you’ve noticed and ASK if they are feeling suicidal, find out if they have felt this way before, and ask if they need help
• Convey your concern to the person

Focus on being understanding, caring and nonjudgmental, saying something like:

“You are not alone. I’m here for you”;
“I may not be able to understand exactly how you feel, but I care about you and want to help”;
“I’m concerned about you and I want you to know there is help available to get you through this”;
“You are important to me; we will get through this together.

• Do not sound judgmental or accusatory in a way that will make the person feel bad
• If the person decides to talk to you, just listen.
• Remove potential means such as weapons and medications to reduce risk.
• Link them with the help they need. Call the National Suicide Prevention toll free numbers 1192, 116, 1195 or 1190. You can also call the USIU-Africa Counseling Center on +254 730 116 797 /746 /748 /791 /750, the Security Department on +254 730 116 774 or the Dean of Students on +254 730 116 781.

Remember that speaking up when suicidal isn’t attention seeking and having mental health issues or stressors in your life doesn’t make you weak.

Seeking professional help
There is need for seeking professional help when one has experienced death of a loved one or an important person in their life through suicide. Counseling helps with:

• Creating a physical and psychological safe space, where one can freely talk about the death, something one may not freely do out there because of the stigma associated with death by suicide. Loss and Grief therapy can be provided for the individual or for the family.
• Having control over the grief rather than the grief controlling the person. The person is helped to voluntarily regulate the intense pain and also address the feelings/emotions, thoughts, behavior e.g. withdrawal from others as a result of the loss, deal with any unfinished business with the deceased, manage the shame and the dishonor and other issues in the immediate environment.
• Developing a bearable narrative of the suicide to help pick disturbing issues that are yet to be processed as well as offering emotional relief.
• Allowing all those affected to have a realistic and fair explanation of what happened.
• Rather than just viewing the suicide as a one person’s mistake or failure, looking at all the different factors that allowed suicide to happen.
• Acknowledgment of the truth of what had happened.
• Repairing the relationship with the deceased and agreeing on the responsibility the survivor should realistically and fairly assume.
• Getting relief from the trauma caused by the exposure or imagination of the suicide.
• Working towards repairing, rebuilding, restoring and reclaiming their beliefs about safety, predictability and control.
• Enhancing the sense of self, who am I?
• Enhancing understanding of their relationship with other people.
• Restoring a positive image and confidence in the person’s functioning as a parent, sibling or friend to the deceased.
• Allowing them to learn how to cope with the changes brought about by the death and begin to re-invest in living their life without the deceased.

Healing after suicide loss requires that survivors find reason to go on with their life and focus on the existential questions and reasons for survival.

By Patrick Obel

We are living at a time when the third wave of COVID-19 has hit our country with devastating results. It is therefore vital to observe the basic Ministry of Health protocols regarding prevention of infection and its spread.

Although the COVID-19 and its effects is a new condition that the doctors and other scientists are still learning more about and with the information that it affects the respiratory system, the effect on the lungs cannot be underestimated. According to reports, it has been reported that about 14% of COVID-19 cases have been severe with an infection that affects both lungs. It has also been observed that, the infection can damage the walls and linings of the air sacs in a patient’s lungs. As the body tries to fight it, the lungs become more inflamed and filled/flooded with fluid. The outcome then is that the function of the lungs is reduced, making it harder for the lungs to help oxygen enter the Red Blood cells which carry oxygen around the body and to get rid of carbon dioxide as we breath out, without oxygen there is no life.

According to David M. Guidot, and Ashish Jayant Mehta, authors of the book titled ‘Alcohol Use Disorders and the Lung’ research shows that alcohol abuse renders the lung susceptible to dysfunction in response to the inflammatory stresses of sepsis, trauma, and other clinical conditions recognized to cause acute lung injury.They further explain that alcohol consumption accompanied by other drugs makes the situation worse for the health of the consumer. When the lungs have been affected due to substance abuse, it predisposes the health of the consumer to more severe effects should they get COVID-19 infection.

Therefore, as part of our precautionary measure against severe effects of the COVID-19, especially to our lungs, a big part of the respiratory system that involves the exchange of gasses in our body. When an individual smokes, the cells that produce mucus in the lungs and airways grow in size and number making the amount of mucus to increase and thicken. Once this happens, it predisposes the lungs to negative impact that is worsened should the individual contract the COVID-19 virus. A study conducted by the National Authority for the Campaign Against Alcohol and Drug Abuse (NACADA) showed that there was a significant positive association between the alcohol consumption of the parents and that of their children. Parents should specifically take care of their influence upon their children.

The Counseling Center provides information and education communication (IEC) materials and offers support to those that are struggling with alcohol and substance use and or abuse. Where and when necessary we make referrals appropriately. As USIU-Africa, we care and urge us all to be aware, knowledgeable and careful about excessive and irresponsible alcohol consumption and other drugs such as marijuana and tobacco in their different forms that are easily abused. Join us in this year’s Alcohol and Drug Awareness Campaign with the theme: ’Not the Virus, Not the High- Alcohol and Drug Abuse Not for Us-Be Smart‘.

By Patrick Obel

Since March 2020 when the World Health Organization (WHO) declared COVID - 19 a public health emergency of international concern and the first case was diagnosed in Kenya, life has never been the same again for everyone. The ongoing pandemic has affected people differently depending on the effects, be they economic, social, political and health.

One of the effects of COVID -19 has been sleep disturbance. Sleep is a biological need for life and health, similar to the need for food. Sleep affects your mental and physical performance as well as long-term health. The longer you go without sleep, the more you are prone to slow thinking, confusion, and making mistakes. This could put you and others around you at risk of injuries and death.

The Royal Society for Public Health notes that it is important that we all understand the purpose of sleep. Sleep is responsible in helping with restoring and organizing the brain networks. Laboratory studies have shown that any single cell taken from the body will maintain a stable 24-hour pattern, which is a demonstration that sleep is a force to be harnessed rather than challenged. Sleep is therefore a natural process that plays a significant role in human existence. Whereas we are able to make deliberate choices on other biological drives like hunger and thirst, we don’t have such luxury with sleep because it is involuntary.

There are medical causes that can affect sleep, however there is a significant number of people that may be struggling with sleep as an effect of the pandemic which has made many people anxious because of the unpredictability of the future which includes fear of income losses or real losses, death, contracting the virus and many other such cases. If you find yourself sleeping less than you should, this will lead to an accumulation of lost sleep hours and is likely to result into negative consequences such as cognitive impairment, or even medical conditions of ill health.

The table below shows recommended hours of sleep:

Adapted from National Sleep Foundation Recommendations 2015.

According to a study by the Division of Sleep Medicine at Harvard Medical School, sleeping less than five hours per night may increase mortality risk by up to 15 percent.

More effects are seen in the following diagram:

Adopted from Healthline.

Signs that you are not sleeping adequately include:

By Lydia Winda

The COVID-19 virus has shaken the whole world and shifted the focus of everybody, putting the world in a position where people can easily turn a blind eye to other equally fatal diseases like cancers, communicable diseases, HIV & AIDS among others. January is world cervical cancer awareness month and as such, it is important to note that cervical cancer is still here with us.

Cervical cancer is a type of reproductive health cancer that occurs in the cells of the cervix — the lower part of the uterus that connects to the vagina. It is the fourth most common cancer in women ranking after breast cancer (2.1 million cases), colorectal cancer (0.8 million) and lung cancer (0.7 million). In 2018 alone, approximately 570 000 women were diagnosed with cervical cancer worldwide and about 311 000 women died from the disease which is quite on the higher side. Moreover, cervical cancer was the leading cause of cancer-related death in women in Eastern, Western, middle, and Southern Africa. Specialists state that 75% of cervical cancers are preventable through cervical cancer screening that leads to early diagnosis. Further, 9 women are diagnosed with cervical cancer every day, 2 women lose their lives to the disease every day and most cases of cervical cancer are at ages under 50 years old (The Lancet Global Health). Most cases of cervical cancer are caused by Human Papilloma Virus (HPV) which is a Sexually Transmitted Infection (STI).